Hello everyone! I've deleted all of my past posts. However, given the past 2 months (almost) I really think its time to get back into writing. All the stress I went through while in college doesn't come close to what I have been going through recently. Valentine's Day/weekend was insane at work, but I was rewarded by Matt bringing me roses while I was at work. To top it off as I got into my car after my shift, it was full of balloons, as well as some chocolate and a gift certificate to a spa.
When I got home, all I wanted to do was relax as a result of all the rude people that had been in that night. Two of my last three tables managed to make me cry because they were so rude! The other table gave me and excellent tip as they had observed how I had been treated and the lack of help my co-workers gave. So yeah, the rest of the night when I got home is pretty much a blur since I was soooooo exhausted.
So, I got up the next morning and prepared for an interview at a mental health facility in town. Matt and I went out for breakfast and ran a few last minute errands. Just as we were getting home, I received a phonecall from a family friend from my mom's cell phone. Turns out that my dad had a massive heart attack and I was to take the first flight home I could get. So I went to my interview, which believe it or not actually went well considering the stress and shock I was experiencing. But I flew to Tampa and stayed with my aunt that night and the two of us caught a flight home the next day.
For the next few weeks my dad was in an induced coma in which his heart and lungs both failed. There were many long days sitting at the hospital just waiting. Waiting for a doctor to tell us something. Sitting there worrying about what you could get told every day for 44 days is worse than having a job and going every day. Seriously. Finally they took him off the heart pump. Then one day they decided to wake him up. He got to come home Wednesday, on Mom's birthday which was nice. However, its still a waiting game. He goes back to the doctor tomorrow so maybe we will know more. Like the possibility of a transplant. I hope that's not the case.
There's so much to the past month and a half that has just destroyed me as a person. Like I said, sitting at the hospital everyday just waiting is worse than having a job. It's no way to live at all and completely depressing. The part that pisses me off the most is the fact that my mother seems to think she and dad are the only ones affected. Like this doesn't affect my mental health at all. I'm supposed to be happy and all that stuff. Well this has put my entire life on hold. I'm probably not going to get that job I was basically offered. I may not even be able to go back to the Lob since I have been gone so long. My relationship with my boyfriend is in pieces that I'm beginning to believe cannot be put back together. But my dad is still alive. He's still here, so that's something to be thankful for.
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